Don’t worry. Be happy
“I highly recommend worrying. It is much more effective than dieting.”
– William Powell
I’m a worrier. I always think something awful will happen and jump to worst-case scenarios.
It goes back to when I was 8 years old and decided that if I worried about life, everything would be OK – but if I relaxed and let go, something awful would happen.
In the Irish Catholic school days of my youth, something bad really could happen. It appeared nuns with robes and huge headgear spent their lives metering out physical and mental punishment to children, who were supposed to be seen and not heard. Meanwhile, my family’s motto seemed to be: When in doubt, panic. It’s no wonder I worried.
In adulthood, worrying became a mantle I carried around like a security blanket – immobilizing me and making me unable to sometimes make decisions or jump into life.
But I am not alone. Seniors have their fair share of worries, with one report listing sexual problems, loss of friends and/or spouse, financial loss and death as the major worries for those in their golden years. Just the thought of all those concerns is enough to set my worrying mind into spin cycle.
“Sometimes worry is a good thing” says Bruce Levin, a psychiatrist in Plymouth Meeting, Penn. “If there is an actual threat, then there is something to worry about. If you run into a bear in the woods, you have something to worry about.”
In these cases, he notes, “not worrying may be more of a problem than to worry.”
Think about Woody Allen, who made a career and millions of dollars making fun of his worry and neurosis in his movies.
But being a worry wort can have many negative outcomes. Unrelenting anxious thoughts and fears can be paralyzing. They can sap emotional energy and send anxiety levels soaring, leaving people feeling restless and jumpy. This can cause insomnia, headaches, stomach problems and muscle tension.
Psychologists and health experts have suggestions to help eliminate some of the remnants of a worried mind:
Exercise. If we can put our worries aside and get up and get moving, we can help ourselves. Exercise can release endorphins that relieve tension and stress, boost energy and enhance your sense of well-being.
Meditate. Meditation switches your focus from worrying about the future or dwelling on the past to what’s happening right now. By being fully engaged in the present moment, you can interrupt the endless loop of negative thoughts and worries.
Deep breathing. When you worry, you become anxious and breathe faster – often leading to further anxiety. Deep breathing exercises can calm your mind and quiet negative thoughts.
Mindfulness. The centuries-old practice of mindfulness can help you break free of your worries by bringing your attention back to the present.
Accept uncertainty. If you’re a chronic worrier, the vast majority of your anxious thoughts probably are not solvable. Worrying is often a way to try to predict what the future has in store as people try to control the outcome to prevent unpleasant surprises. Sometimes, this is simply not possible.
